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Skills Training Manual For Treating Borderline Personality Disorder

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"Respect the power of coaching questions" is one of the first learning points that I cover with the managers I train as coaches. I go on to explain that they must recognize the possibility that what starts as coaching around a simple, work related issue, may lead to the unveiling of a more significant problem. In my view, coaching managers should develop at least a little psychological awareness. Consider for example, the two main types of personality disorder, Multiple Personality and Antisocial Personality Disorder.



Multiple Personality

It is increasingly being recognized that it may be possible for more than one personality to exist within the same individual. This is a fascinating area of abnormal psychology but must not be confused with schizophrenia which is about divisions within one personality.

In studying sufferers of this condition, psychologists and other observers may notice two or more distinct personalities emerging. The emergence of one of the 'alternative' personalities will be marked by obvious changes in posture, language and tone. Sometimes that alternative personalities may not be aware of the existence of each other and each can be quite different - a kind of 'good side' and 'bad side' of the same person.

The condition is thought to arise when, in an attempt to cope with a traumatic experience, an individual slips into a kind of fugue state; a sort of self-hypnosis. If this succesfully provides relief, then the method is used time and again until the alternate personalities are effectively set in place and can be summoned at will.

Thigpen and Cleckley (1954) uncovered 'Eve White,' 'Eve Black' and 'Eve Grey' within the same young lady, each with a very different personality. It is easy to see why, in less sophisticated times, sufferers would be dismissed as being possessed.

Antisocial Personality Disorder

Once called Psychopaths or Sociopaths, the distinguishing feature for sufferers of this condition is that there is little if any personal trauma. The sociopath is perfectly self-content but a danger to society as the condition is marked by an absence of morality or conscience.

Symptons include: emotional flatness and a lack of empathy, a disposition towards senseless, often violent crime and a tendency towards lying, theft and vandalism.

Treatment is very difficult; Imprisonment simply gives access to other criminals, physical punishment is counter-productive and psychotherapy usually fails to bring about the required insight. Non-institutional, moderate punishment is considered the most effective.

The sociopath has provided a rich vein of source material in recent times for the writers and producers of written and filmed thrillers. The best known example being Dr Hannibal Lekter from the book and the film: The Silence of the Lambs.

What then of the coaching manager who perhaps unwittingly uncovers signs of such issues when coaching around workload management or time keeping? My advice would be to rely on solid coaching principles. Ask questions designed to raise awareness, generate responsibility and build trust then listen carefully and attentively to the responses. This is highly unlikely to make things worse and may actually do quite a lot of good.

After that, it's a question of referring the coachee to the relevant professional. For this reason I recommend that all coaching managers familiarize themselves with their organization's welfare procedure.
Skills Training Manual For Treating Borderline Personality Disorder
Notwithstanding all the energy we have put into coaching in the first four stages of the ARROW sequence, in some ways we have achieved very little. In truth we have thought, pondered, intellectualized and navel gazed but changed nothing.

This is why the last section of the ARROW sequence - Way Forward - is so vital, because it's where we turn thought into action.

If we've coached well to this point we should begin to see a rise in energy levels of the people we coach as they realize that they are resourceful and can move their own issues forward and become excited at the prospect of doing so.

It's so useful if we, as coaches, mirror this excitement to signal our belief and to encourage a definitive course of action.

Many coaches report that this part of the process is largely automatic and it is often simply a matter of making sure people plan their actions in a sensible and logical way.

In many ways coaching for a Way Forward is akin to the kind of action planning that most people are used to anyway. We need firstly to have the coachee outline exactly what it is they intend to do. Detail is crucial here so challenge any vague responses. I also recommend having them state exactly when a planned action will begin and end. Such a date does not have to be considered irreversible; it can be changed as things move on. But without at least an aspirational completion date there can be no real commitment.

Next we need to get the coachee to fully consider who else nneds to know of their plans and to think through how and when they will tell them. We should also invite them to think about any other resources that may be required and create a plan for getting them.

Throughout the Way Forward stage the emphasis is on what they WILL do rather than what they COULD do.

Towards the end of this part of the conversation it's wise to check that the course or courses of action decided upon will deliver the aims established at the start of the session. Any assistance that we feel we can provide as a coach should be offered rather than imposed.

I like to end by asking the person being coached to rate their commitment to taking the course of action they have thought out on a scale of 1-10. We might think that because we have gone through the model thoroughly and carefully that the answer here will always be ten but this isn't necessarily so. There are times when a coachee will still appear reluctant to move forward despite a well-constructed coaching session and when this happens there is invariably a blockage somewhere.

It may be because our coachee feels that other parties involved in the issue will not play their part in moving things forward. Sometimes it's because people are absolutely clear about what needs doing and certain it will work, but lack the courage to put the plan into action. Generally speaking, if we get an answer to the final question of anything less than 7, then the chances are that the person will not take action and our coaching session will have proven ineffective.

We need to discover what the barrier is by asking a further question - "What would make it a 10?" In answering this question the person being coached will come to an awareness of what's preventing full commitment and we will perhaps have uncovered a more deep-rooted coaching issue which can be handled separately. Sometimes by the time we get to Way Forward we find that the person has articulated the same solution two or three times in the session. This is perfectly okay and suggests that such a solution is one to which the person will be most committed. In this way, going through the coaching ARROW is rather like going up a spiral staircase. We will see the same things each time we go round but always from a slightly new perspective and so we build a more complete picture.
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Matt Somers has sinced written about articles on various topics from Power of Coaching, Career Change and Depression Cure. Matt Somers is a coaching practitioner of many years' experience. He works with a host of clients in North East England where his firm is based and throughout the UK and Europe. Matt understands that people are working with their true potential locked awa. Matt Somers's top article generates over 8100 views. to your Favourites.
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