What a man says and what he does are often times two different things. A relationship with a man is all about being able to ?tell? what he means even if he is not saying it aloud. Many times a man is going to talk about a relationship with you, a commitment if you are going to bring it up first. Often times a man is not going to initiate any discussions about a commitment or the problems the two of you are facing.
1.A man is going to tell you he doesn't need a paper to tell him he is involved with a woman, and to be involved in a commitment. He wants to keep the relationship the way it is already. What the man is really telling you is that yes, he loves you but he is scared. Most often, a man is not going to get married to prove that he loves you he already does or he wouldn't be with you. A man is not going to get married and not take that final step in commitment because he is happy with the understanding and the relationship that you already have and enjoy.
2.A man who is online all the time, and who is involved with chatting with girls tells you it is just for fun, and that you should trust him more because what harm could come from chatting online. He wants to continue chatting online with women and he wants you to butt out of his life. The reality of what a man is telling in you in this situation is that he is talking with someone online and sharing his life with someone online. He knows it is wrong, but you are not going to be able to tell him what to do or how he should be doing it. A man is going to continue chatting online because he feels the challenge of the woman on the other end of the line, and loves the new attention he is getting from her.
3.The man in your life is constantly telling you to get a job, that you need to be more supportive of the household. What this man is really trying to tell you is that he can't support all of your needs and his. He feels that for the relationship to work, you need to take an active role in bringing in the money and paying for some of the bills as well. The man in your life could be afraid that you are depending on him just too much and that you should get out there and make new friends, even if they are friends you meet at work.
4.A man who hits a woman, and then tells you he is sorry and didn't mean it is really lying. A man, that is abusive, is going to continue to be abusive. The abusive man wants to feel power and control in the relationship. The man who can't control his feelings is likely to never change, unless you are able to change the reason why he hit you to start with. Your best option is to run from this relationship no matter what the cost or pain you feel.
5.When a man tells you that his family is very important to him and that you need to back down from his mother he is really telling you that he would choose his mother over you. While he might tell you it is going to be easier to get along if you were to change, he is really telling you that no matter what you do you are never going to please her, so you will have to change your ways to be a part of the family. In reality if the family can't accept who you are and how your life is, you shouldn't be a part of that family. It will only lead to ongoing grief and frustration in your life.
6.A man who is constantly working late, and calls to tell you he will be late again is not always on the up and up. If his paycheck never changes, or when you call the office and he doesn't answer, the man is really telling you that he is not coming home right now and he has better things to do than to spend time with you. If you are always sitting at home, wondering where your man is, and he tells you he is working late all the time and can't make time for important matters, you need to move on in life because nine times out of ten he is cheating on you.
7.A man feels there is nothing wrong with having women friends. Most times this is going to be the case, and a woman friend is not going to be a problem. However, if your man is telling you that he just likes hanging out with this one woman he knows, it is likely he is cheating on you. He may not be having sexual relations with her, but he is cheating on you because he is giving his attention to her. He is cheating on you by being there for her and not for you when you need him most. He will tell you he is not cheating on you, but when he sticks up for her again and again, you know there is an intimacy level there that should not be.
What He Really Means
Cheating is the symptom, not the cause…
Relationships today are based on ownership and possession - partners feeling like they own their spouses and try to control their every move.
What if we all came from a place of unconditional love and acceptance?
What if we stopped confusing sex for love - they are not the same thing. You can have sex with someone that you do not love and you can love someone that you do not have sex with. Wouldn't you agree?
So if that's true, what is cheating?
It's a breaking of trust. While trust is vital to a happy relationship, it may not necessarily mean that your partner doesn't love you or that they love another. If you focus on having an open and trusting relationship where there's no fear and no judgment, it's very unlikely that your partner will cheat. Of course you both have to agree to this path. Trusting your partner completely and sharing everything while they don't reciprocate is simply foolish.
My recommendation for ending cheating in a relationship is to talk openly and honestly to one another without anger, fear, or judgment. When a person cheats, they are typically looking for something that they feel is missing is their relationship with their partner.
If you can truly talk to each other about everything - including the fact that your partner is sexually attracted to another person, then you have complete trust in your relationship and the need for cheating disappears.
Both Cucan Pemo & Dan And Jennifer are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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