Destiny was calling   Monday afternoon   Wednesday, you'll be crawling   And you'll pray to be there soon      With sports and wine, yeah, yeah   Sports and wine, no, no      Some men never grew up   Fortunate like you   Some men never found out   What it takes to be a dude      That's sports and wine, yeah, yeah   Sports and wine, no, no, no      The girls don't understand it   What you think is art   My, oh my, we're all impressed   How sensitive you are      Everybody's talking about you now   You know it's true   Because it always has been   Sports and wine for you      So you asked me how I think I know   Just what makes you tick   I don?t know what I know you know   I know you make me sick      Sports and wine, sports and wine      The girls don't understand it   Anything you say   I don't understand it either   Guess that makes me gay      Everybody's talking about you now   You know it's true, no, no, no