Posed like swallows before a dive   Five lanes, and on the left hand side   Stands Tubby Barlow wet with fear   Not quite sure what he's doing there   On your marks, get set, and they're in   Tubby's consumed by the urge to win   Four are greased lightning, one is lard   But Tubby's determined not to be left behind   Ten years of being pushed around flash before his eyes   Alone in the schoolyard eating his pride   In third place as they reach the turn   His arms ache and his chest burns   Kids are cheering from the balcony   Tubby's oblivious, all he can see   Is that this is the moment to change his life   By collecting a trophy on the other side   Past Steven Clough and Kenny Grey   "Mum, mum, I'm winning the race!"   He opens his mouth and water floods in   He's coughing, choking, panicking   Down once, down twice, 'till someone screams   "Sir, Tubby Barlow's drowning!"   But Baz Wilson's already in   Got his intermediate in life saving   The captain of the football team   Idol of every young girl's dream   Drags Tubby towards the rope   But Tubby's confused and grips his throat   As both boys begin to skin   "Sir, Baz Wilson's drowning!"   Tubby opens his eyes for one last time   Sees Baz flailing at his side   Like Jesus after the resurrection   Sees himself as Baz's salvation   Grabs Baz, heads for the side   "Chariots of Fire" playing in his mind   Meanwhile Steven Clough gets first position   But they're all watching Tubby save Baz Wilson   Now Tubby lays like a whale on the shore   Gasping and spewing like a real hero   Like a real hero!