I shudder to think what my father would think   If he came home and found me in bed   With more then just one but several of some   Lovely big strawberries      He'll probably shout, give me a hell of a clout   Or perhaps a good kick up the rear   But one thing's for sure, I'll have to endure   A great deal of pain so to speak      I know it's not right   But for a laugh every night   I knock on people's doors   And shout things like "up yours"      I'll never know why   But for some reason I   Never did well at school   All I did was break rules and tell lies      His birthday's next week so I thought as a treat   I would buy him his favorite book   It's not one of those with poetic prose   Just full frontal nudity