History repeats the old conceits    The glib replies the same defeats    Keep your finger on important issues    With crocodile tears and a pocketful of tissues    I'm just the oily slick    On the windup world of the nervous tick    In a very fashionable hovel       I hang around dying to be tortured    You'll never be alone in the bone orchard    This battle with the bottle is nothing so novel       So in this almost empty gin palace    Through a two-way looking glass    You see your Alice       You know she has no sense    For all your jealousy    In a sense she still smiles very sweetly       Charged with insults and flattery    Her body moves with malice    Do you have to be so cruel to be callous       And now you find you fit this identikit completely    You say you have no secrets    And then leave discreetly       I might make it California's fault    Be locked in Geneva's deepest vault    Just like the canals of Mars and the great barrier reef    I come to you beyond belief       My hands were clammy and cunning    She's been suitably stunning    But I know there's not a hope in Hades    All the laddies cat call and wolf whistle    So-called gentlemen and ladies    Dog fight like rose and thistle       I've got a feeling    I'm going to get a lot of grief    Once this seemed so appealing    Now I am beyond belief       (Repeat chorus)