I had a lot of acne and pimples   I had to stay at home   Eventually no-one came near me   All I had was my comb      And when it came to girls   The other guys   Seem to have all the luck   Until one day   I heard them say   His comb is full of muck!      Now he's the King of Scurf   (They know me everywhere)   King of Scurf   (I got filthy hair)   He's got dandruff   (More than my share)   I'm the King of Scurfers, yeah!      Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   King of Scurfers, yeah!      Only last Saturday, we had a scene   At our local pub   Everybody was jumpin' and jivin'   Some were doin' the Bop      I was shakin' my head   The dandruff spread   Like leaves blowin' off the trees   Million teeny boppers and long-haired moppers   In scurf right up to their knees      Now he's the King of Scurf   (They know me everywhere)   King of Scurf   (I got filthy hair)   He's got dandruff   (More than my share)   I'm the King of Scurfers, yeah!      Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   King of Scurfers, yeah!      At the beach one day a muscle man   Kicked some sand in my face   So I whipped out my comb and scratched my dome   And sure put him back in his place      You see, the top of my head   Was evenly spread   Like the snow on top of the Alps   The scurfin' kids really flipped their lids   When they saw the state of my scalp      King of Scurf   (They know me everywhere)   King of Scurf   (I got filthy hair)   He's got dandruff   (More than my share)   I'm the King of Scurfers, yeah!      Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   Ooh, scurfing, yeah   King of Scurfers, yeah!