To be that good, it must be taxin'  No such thing as satisfaction  You're makin' things happen while I'm relaxin'  Like a Sunday afternoon  My dad used to tell me I was lazy  I got dance moves like Patrick Swayze   I'm the left over turkey for the world's mayonnaisey  The star next to the moon     Now I know I'm just here to amuse you  And I don't mean to abuse you  But if I could just use you one time     Tell me what it's like  To be the queen of it all  The Neiman Marcus of the Mall  And tell me what it's like to be the one and only  All American Girl     Now I never had a supernatural feelin'  Not to mention a sexual healin'  But every now and then I get to the kneelin'  To thank him for it all  But you probably got some inside connection  So many numbers that you gotta rolodex them  So much muscle that you never gotta flex them  To catch you when you fall     And I know I'm just here to amuse you  And I don't mean to confuse you  But if I could just use you one more time     Tell me what it's like to be the house on the hill  The number one diet pill  And tell me what it's like to be the one and only  All American Girl     Now I bet you won't say you get crazy  Or that you don't shave your legs  When you're lazy  Or that you're just like everybody else in the world  You just got lucky, that's all     And I know you're not here to amuse me  But you sure know how to confuse me  So if I could just ask you once again     To tell me what it's like to be a star on the rise  A breakfast cereal prize  And tell me what it's like to be the one and only  All American Girl  The All American Girl  The all amazing crazy girl