They call me   William Holden Caulfield   It was no compliment   What's wrong with   William Holden Caulfield      All that stuff that bummed me out ten years ago   Still bugs me today, and boy I wanna know   Who died and made you my mom and me some stupid kid   How can you forget all those things we did      Keep on sleeping on   Till your hair is gray   When I turn eighty   I better feel this way      I'm afraid of people who like Catcher in the Rye   Yeah, I like it too, but someone tell me why   People he'd despise say I feel like that guy   I don't wanna grow up 'cause I don't wanna die   When I'm thirty-one    Keep living on   For fifty more years      They call me   William Holden Caulfield   It was no compliment   What's wrong with   William Holden Caulfield      Keep on sleeping on   Till your hair is gray   When I turn eighty   I better feel this way      I respect the man in Sunset Boulevard   Got a heart somewhere just won't let down his guard   Doesn't trust happiness or the bad luck that it brings   He's lonely and he's cold   He's proud of these things   I said I'm cold   And I'm lonely   I said I'm cold   And I'm lonely      So call me William Holden   I say   Keep on sleeping on   Till your hair is gray   When I turn eighty   I better, I better feel, I better feel this way