Well, I met Don Quixote in a bar the other night   He looked a little pale but he said he was alright   He loved Dulcenea but she left him all the same   For a long black limo and a pound of rock cocaine      He looked into his whiskey and took a little sip   He said "I never had much money and I've never been too hip,   I couldn't buy her clothes, I couldn't buy that great big boat   But I always held the door for her and helped her with her coat"      Then he turned to me and said "I hope you understand   Yeah, it's tough to be just an ordinary man"      I ran into Jesus at a luxury hotel   I could see by his expression that he wasn't feeling well   I said "What's the matter?" He said "Everything is cool"   Turned my Perrier to wine then he walked across the pool      So I just stepped right up and said "This seems a little odd"   He said "Steve, it ain't easy to be the son of God   And sometimes I wonder if I got what it takes   To assume responsibility for everyone's mistakes"      Then he turned to me and said "I hope you understand   All I want to be is an ordinary man"      Well, the devil left a message on my answering machine   He said "I see you're going nowhere so I thought I'd make the scene   If you make a few concessions maybe I could lend a hand   And you won't have to be no ordinary man"      Well, I called up the devil and said "I think I'm gonna pass   Indeed I'm kinda happy despite my sorry ass   I don't need no fame or fortune, I don't need you   All I need is a buxom woman and an occasional brew"      Then I turned to him and said "I hope you understand   All I want to be is an ordinary man"