Well Ali Baba had them forty thieves   Scheherezad-ie had a thousand tales   But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves   You got a brand of magic never fails   You got some power in your corner now   Some heavy ammunition in your camp   You got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how   See all you gotta do is rub that lamp   And I'll say   Mister Aladdin, sir   What will your pleasure be?   Let me take your order   Jot it down   You ain't never had a friend like me   No no no   Life is your restaurant   And I'm your maitre d'   C'mon whisper what it is you want   You ain't never had a friend like me   Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service   You're the boss   The king, the shah   Say what you wish   It's yours! True dish   How about a little more Baklava?   Have some of column "A"   Try all of column "B"   I'm in the mood to help you dude   You ain't never had a friend like me   Can your friends do this?   Do your friends do that?   Do your friends pull this out their little hat?   Can your friends go, poof?   Well, looky here   Can your friends go, Abracadabra, let 'er rip   And then make the sucker disappear?   So doncha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed   I'm here to answer all your midday prayers   You got me bona fide, certified   You got a genie for your chare d'affaires   I got a powerful urge to help you out   So what-cha wish? I really wanna know   You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt   Well, all you gotta do is rub like so - and oh   Mister Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or three   I'm on the job, you big nabob   You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend   You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend   You ain't never had a friend like me   You ain't never had a friend like me, hah!