But i do want to thank you all for coming tonight.   tonight is all about sharing like i said   -woo-oo-woo-ho-   whether it, whether it be stories that make laugh   or even stories that make you cry it is so   du-du-ba-da-ba-da-ba   so very important to share   if you guys take atleast one thing from the show tonight   -ba-du-ba-da-   i do hope it's laughter but   if you take away two things from the show i hope it be laughter   -ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-   and this simple message god bless you all      please don't put your penis in a jar of peanut butter   unless you're sure that your girlfriend's not at home   ska-da-ba-da      you know guys driving here tonight um, a woman cut me off   which uh, it isn't the first time that it happened it's not the last time it's ever going to happen   what was interesting about this time was that after she cut me off she felt the need to give me the finger   which i didn't understand because i was the cut offee not the cut offeryou know? yeah.   so if i could share something to this confused woman it'd   learn how to use your signal you dumb bitch!   and stop spreading all the evil that you're spreading   evil   and i, i'd tell her this aswell    god bless you all      please don't put you penis in a jar of peanut butter   don't fucking do it people i'm telling you   unless you're sure that your girlfriend still at work   and even if you're sure she's still at work   make sure you put the chain on the door   so that your landlord doesn't come in to fix a leaky faucet   find you standing there with your...   penis in a jar of peanut butter      guys please thank you, thank you very much but... hear me out, hear me out   this is   thank you but   please don't ever...   ever use crunchy   ooh   thank you everyone   thanks   thank you