Well, I've already had two beers   I'm ready for the broom   Please, Missus Henry, won't you   Take me to my room?   I'm a good ol' boy   But I've been sniffin' too many eggs   Talkin' to too many people   Drinkin' too many kegs   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   I'm down on my knees   An' I ain't got a dime      Well, I'm groanin' in a hallway   Pretty soon I'll be mad   Please, Missus Henry, won't you   Take me to your dad?   I can drink like a fish   I can crawl like a snake   I can bite like a turkey   I can slam like a drake   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   I'm down on my knees   An' I ain't got a dime      Now, don't crowd me, lady   Or I'll fill up your shoe   I'm a sweet bourbon daddy   An' tonight I am blue   I'm a thousand years old   And I'm a generous bomb   I'm T-boned and punctured   But I'm known to be calm   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   I'm down on my knees   An' I ain't got a dime      Now, I'm startin' to drain   My stool's gonna squeak   If I walk too much farther   My crane's gonna leak   Look, Missus Henry   There's only so much I can do   Why don't you look my way   An' pump me a few?   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   Please, Missus Henry, Missus Henry, please!   I'm down on my knees   An' I ain't got a dime