I took her out, it was a Friday night    I wore cologne to get the feeling right    We started making out and she took off my pants    But then I turned on the TV       And that's about the time she walked away from me    Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three   And are still more amused by TV shows    What the hell is ADD?    My friends say I should act my age    What's my age again?    What's my age again?       Then later on, on the drive home    I called her mom from a pay phone    I said I was the cops    And your husband's in jail    This state looks down on sodomy       And that's about the time that bitch hung up on me    Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three   And are still more amused by prank phone calls    What the hell is caller ID?    My friends say I should act my age    What's my age again?    What's my age again?       (Musical Solo)       And that's about the time she walked away from me    Nobody likes you when you're twenty-three   And you still act like you're in Freshman year    What the hell is wrong with me?    My friends say I should act my age    What's my age again?       And that's about the time she broke up with me    No one should take themselves so seriously    With many years ahead to fall in line    Why would you wish that on me?    I never want to act my age    What's my age again?    What's my age again?       What's my age again?