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Healing From Childhood Abuse

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We suggest that you also read the parts previous to this.



Working with Childhood experiences with EFT

?. Make a list of the events, situations, beliefs or emotions which you would like to free yourself from.

Note: EFT works better on emotions which we can feel, thus in each of cases you choose to work with, it will be more effective to work with the emotion created by that event, situation or belief brings.

1. __________________________________________

2. ___________________________________________

3. ___________________________________________

B. Now, for each experience, seek to answer the following questions.

1. What are the various aspects of this experience? (Think of specific actions, stances, words, attitudes, images, sounds, and scenes.)

It may help to talk about or write about this experience describing in detail exactly what happened.

Every time you sense any feelings about what you are speaking or writing about, you can either work on directly or note it on paper in order to work on it later.

In this way you are making a list of aspects of each experience which may be creating a disturbed energy field which is creating the emotions which you would like to become free from.

2. Now for each aspect of experience we will need to realize to the best of our ability what emotions we were or are feeling and what the SUD emotional charge is.

There very well may be a number of simultaneous emotions such as hurt, fear, guilt, injustice and anger. We will need to deal with which ever is most intense and then with the others as they come to the surface.

3. Chose then an aspect and specific emotion which you would like to begin with.

4. Now we are ready to employ EFT on this emotion of the aspect. As we collapse this, then likely other emotions and then other aspects will come to the surface to be discharged.

The Set Up

Note: We use two phrases when doing the set up.

a. We rub on the sore spot on one side (or tap the side of the hand) repeating phrase "A" three times.

b. Then we repeat phrase "B" three times while rubbing the on the sore spot on the other side (or tapping on the side of the other hand).

c. Then we repeat the "C" reminder phrase while tapping on the 12 points.

The Set Up for the primary emotion which we are feeling:

A. Even though I feel (the emotion) _____________ when I think of (the childhood event or situation)_____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

Or

Even though I felt (the emotion) _____________ as a child when (the childhood event or situation)_____, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ______.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) because (the event) ___________

Secondary Emotions

If there is any guilt, shame or other feelings about having the above-mentioned emotions, then those feelings will also need to be dealt with in the same way.

A. Even though I feel (the emotion such as guilt, shame, self-rejection, anger) _____________ when I realize that I feel (primary emotion)_____ about (childhood experience) __________, I deeply and profoundly love myself. .

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (emotion) ______.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The Emotion) because (the event) ___________

Resistance

If there is any resistance towards letting go of those emotions, then that resistance will also need to be collapsed in the same way. Consider some of the possible types of resistance. We need to work on each possible resistance separately.

Possible Beliefs which might cause resistance towards letting go of these emotions.

(Psychological Reversal)

1. I have felt this way a long time and do not know what it will be like to be without this emotion. It will be like losing an important part of myself or my life. (We have become attached or addicted to feeling this way.)

2. I believe that I need this emotion in order to protect myself from others. (Possibly anger, depression, injustice, pain)

3. I will lose my power or control over others. (Perhaps anger, depression, dissatisfaction.)

4. I will lose others? attention if I do not have this emotion.

5. I will lose my self-worth if I do not feel this way. (Especially feeling the victim or angry from which we seek to get our feelings of goodness, rightness - self-worth)

6. I will allow others to be free from feeling guilty or responsible about me. I will lose control over them.

7. I will need to take responsibility for my life.

8. I will need to be happy - something which scares me.

9. I will have to recognize my self-worth - which also scares me.

In such cases of inner obstacles, we can use the following phrases:

A. Even though I fear letting go of this emotion because _____ (resistance) ________________, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

Note: If we sense we have some resistance but do not know what it is then we can just say

"Even though I seem to have some resistance towards letting go of this emotion, I deeply and profoundly love myself."

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept, realize that it is in my benefit) to be free from this (fear or resistance) ________.

C. Reminder Phrase = (The emotion or resistance) _________.

Embodied emotions

If we find that these emotions are manifesting as physical symptoms either in general or during the process of employing EFT, then we might need to address them for a few rounds in the following way.

A. Even though I have this (physical phenomenon) ____________ in my (part of body) ___________, I deeply and profoundly love myself.

B. I choose (want, deserve, allow myself, accept) to be free from this (physical phenomenon) ______ in my (part of body)_____.

C. Reminder Phrase = (physical phenomenon) in my (part of body)

Important Note:

Some of us may have stored emotionally charged memories in our subconscious. We need to release these from our energy system in order to create health, happiness, peace, clarity, evolution and harmonious relationships.

Working with them, however, in some cases, may temporarily bring to the surface some unpleasant or disturbing feelings. We are of course experiencing these negative energies subconsciously and psychosomatically anyway.

Not dealing with them would be like knowing there is a fire in our cellar and refusing to go down and put it out because that would be unpleasant and we would get temporarily dirty. But that unattended fire will soon find it way to our bedroom and living room and our whole house.

So denial and avoidance are not the solution.

Some guidelines for proceeding would be:

1. If you are going to work with your childhood experiences or any other intense emotions and especially depression, you should have an experienced guide for this work. Someone whom you trust and have access to if you need help.

2. Do not do such work immediately before sleeping, driving or important meetings.

3. Thanks to Gary Craig's work with this, you can work "Hypothetically" and then directly with the charged experience.

A. First without closing your eyes or in any way trying to relive your negative experience, ask yourself, " IF I were to come into experiential and emotional contact with this memory, how disturbed would I feel?" So here you take an "Hypothetical SUD".

B. Then employ as many rounds of Hypothetical EFT as you need to get the Hypothetical SUD to 3 or less.

C. Now actually close your eyes and seek to remember the event as vividly as you can and see where your real SUD is and continue to employ EFT on the emotions you have when in direct emotional contact with the event.

D. Continue to work with any other aspects, which might come up.

Our experience is that having worked with the Hypothetical SUD for a number of rounds we have actually collapsed to a great degree the actual energy field. Thus we have an almost painless way of getting from these inner obstacles to health, peace, happiness and success.

If you can find a practitioner experienced TFT, EFT or EMDR, you will be able to get free even more quickly from these emotions.
Healing From Childhood Abuse
First, what are these signs?

1.Exposure to serious physical, emotional or sexual mistreatment as a child

2.Memories of parents who were physically or emotionally neglectful resulting from their chemical dependency, chronic absenteeism, over-reactive tempers etc.

3.Childhood characterized by chaos, frequent moves, abusive spousal partners, frequent substitute caretakers, too many step-siblings etc.

4.Memories of emotionally repressive parents

5. Memories of parents or parental figures who were rigid, perfectionistic, demeaning, hypercritical, fanatically religious, substance abusers and/or threatening

6. Childhood memories associated with irrational fears, suppressed rage, low self-esteem, depression, identity conflicts etc.

7. The use of maladaptive coping mechanisms such as, multiple personality states, psychogenic fugue, amnesia, trance states and/or depersonalization

8. Avoidance of discussion associated with the traumatic event

9. Inability to recall important aspects of the abuse

10. Feelings of detachment or dissociation

11. Inability to experience a full range of emotions normally

12. Saturation with an angry or pessimistic attitude

13. Sleep and/or dream disturbances

14. Chronic irritability

15. Concentration impairment

16. Inexplicable pervasive worry

17. Short temper

18. Feelings of depression or despair

19. Abuse of alcohol or drugs

20 Transient or fleeting suicidal thoughts

21. Chronic conflict in relationships

22. Difficulty in functioning normally because of free-floating anxiety

If you experience any of these symptoms, it would behoove you to seek therapy or counseling.

But what will your counseling accomplish? How will it benefit you?

1.It should reduce the dysfunctional impact that the abuse has on your life.

2.You will be able to implement effective coping skills to fulfill normal responsibilities with less discomfort and begin to participate constructively in relationships.

3.You will be able to remember instances of the abuse without being overwhelmed by anger and anxiety.

4.You will be able to reduce the escape and denial behaviors prevalent in your everyday life and begin to implement constructive behaviors that promote healing and normal living

5. You will be able to fall asleep faster and not be awakened by disturbing dreams of instances of the abuse.

6. You will be able to replace negative, pessimistic thinking with constructive, self-enhancing and more optimistic thinking processes.

7. You will be able to implement anger control techniques to subdue your irritation and anger.

8. You will be able to eliminate any of your abuse of mind-altering substances

9. You will be able to implement relaxation training as a coping mechanism for the tension, stress and anxiety relating to your childhood pain.

10. You will be able to significantly reduce the resentment and futility which saturates your thinking about the past.

11. You will start seeing the future as hopeful and positive rather than bleak and depressing

12. Upon repeated re-telling about your dysfunctional past you will be able to do so increasingly with gradually reduced anxiety

13. You will start feeling a reduction in any of your vindictive feelings associated with the past. You will be able to use relaxation and positive imagery to reduce any anxiety or sleep problems related to the trauma

14. You will be able to identify and reduce any catastrophic expectations or headaches caused by the trauma

15. You should be able to approach previously avoided situations with much less stress.

16. You should have a thorough understanding of the results of abuse and be able to progressively reduce the negative impact of any relapses.
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Both Robert Elias Najemy & Dr Mike Shery are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.

Robert Elias Najemy has sinced written about articles on various topics from Self Esteem, Dating and Romance and Web Development. Robert E. Najemy, author of 25 books and life coach with 30 years of experience, has trained over 300 life coaches and now does so over the Internet. Become a life coach.Over 600 free article and lectures at. Robert Elias Najemy's top article generates over 74000 views. to your Favourites.

Dr Mike Shery has sinced written about articles on various topics from Cure Anxiety, Cure Anxiety and Family. Dr Shery is in Cary, IL, near Algonquin, Crystal Lake, Marengo and Lake-in-the-Hills. He's an expert marriage counselor and psychologist. Call 1 847 516 0899 and make an appt or. Dr Mike Shery's top article generates over 9900 views. to your Favourites.
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