If you are going through a breakup it's very easy to be snowed under with emotional chaos. Do you lie awake in the night thinking about all possible ways on how to get your ex back?

Research shows that most 85-90 % of the breaks ups can be reversed if you act fast enough provided you do the right things to get your ex back in your arms. But the problem is that most people a do it wrong. In fact, in many cases you will be driving your ex even further from you and not back to you!

Relationships are very fragile bonds that need to be built up and maintained in order to keep them healthy and allow them to flourish. It's very easy to get carried away in a relationship and before you know you find yourself reading articles like this on getting your ex back.

So here are the best ways to get your ex back.

1. Take it easy and do some Evaluation. You need to calm down bear in mind that you are high on emotions and it's easy to get desperation get on you. Desperate situations like this can bring the worst out of us. You know what I mean, the fear, resentment, depression, sadness, loneliness will drive you insane, this phase is probably the most difficult, yet one of the most important ways to get your ex back.

Don't spoil your chances by blowing things out of proportion and acting in a way which would regret later. Remember the good old saying, "patience is a virtue"? You need to take responsibility for your emotions and put on you thinking caps. This is a time when its easy to defy the logical thinking, make sure you have complete control over your emotions, trust me this will grow you as a person more than anything else.

2. Rediscover yourself and decide on an action plan

Of all the ways you can think of getting your ex back, this is going to be the most vital step. The outcome of this step will decide if you are going to get back with your ex. Rest assured mess up this step you are guaranteed to lose your ex for ever. Your first priority is to have a strategy to refrain yourself from begging, pleading, smothering, whining and in extreme cases trying to overpower you ex into your arms.

Stay away from those impulses actions instead concentrate on rediscovering and redesigning yourself. This is a time to take inventory of you really are and most of all improve upon that. Be the best you can be. You have to think of ways to create attraction and even passion from your ex. You have to create a plan that will help you become a better person for the person you love.

3. Be understanding and flexible. Don't be forceful or demanding with your ex, its not going to lead you anywhere except to a dead wall. Be more understanding and accommodating. Your listening skills could do wonders at this stage.

When you take the efforts to be patient and listen to your partner, what do you think they will feel? They naturally see the better side of you, and start questioning their decision of breaking up. Open the lines of communication and you will be amazed at how things change.

4. Don't be a loner. This is not the best time for you to be by yourself. Time to get out of the house and get in touch with some friends. Develop a support network around you, polish your social networking skills, trust me you'll feel better. Don't be sulk into a shell that you start deteriorating your self image, get drowned in your thoughts and get attacked by bouts of depression.

Instead take the bull by the horn and utilize this opportunity to build strong friendships and relationships. Watch out for the rebound relationships though. Chances are that your ex might even notice this and start feeling the loss of a great lover and might want to get back you.

5. Be yourself. The reason you both feel in love in the first place was because you both noticed some traits or personality which appealed to each other and over the course of time this might have evolved into something else, by being yourself your ex will start noticing that quality again. This renewed self perception of your own self will surely rub off on your ex as well and take you a step closer to getting your ex back.

6. Creating more value for yourself - When your ex left you, in many cases it was because she did not value you and your relationship high enough to stay. Therefore, your job is to create more value for yourself. For example, if you're a man, you can build more value by practicing active listening which translates to love for women.

If you are a woman you can create value by respecting him more. You create value when you satisfy the hidden needs of each other, and when you do that you become powerful love magnet. Who would want to lose someone who is like a dream come true?

By now you will have realized that getting your ex back is not rocket science. It's simply common sense and strategies or game plan that will suit you best. Most people fail to use these proven strategies to pull your ex back. The best ways to get your ex back are the simple things when applied or put into practice gives powerful results.