Being married means different things to different people but why then are there so many divorces? Most people have become self centered and not committed to the other person's happiness. Once you learn how to communicate and finally turn the tide in your relationship you will never save your marriage.

Let's face it, we are not all created equal when we decide to take the plunge and marry that sweetheart we've been dating for awhile. Often times after the honeymoon is over for awhile, things between the two of you start a long downward spiral that seems impossible to stop.

Here are things to do either ahead of a breakup or even after one that will help save your marriage or even if you haven't even gotten married yet, will help to keep you together when you are married.

First, assuming that you are married and still together but maybe having a few problems now and then, one of the biggest things that will make all the difference in the world is good communication with your spouse.

Notice I said GOOD? Finding the better qualities of your spouse and complimenting on them is a good way to divert a disagreement. If you are headed for an argument, take a time out until you both can feel the anger dissipate and just hold hands or touch each other very gently. This touching will stop the anger if done gently and recreate that bond and spark you both felt originally which will go along way towards helping you to save your marriage.

Second, learning how to communicate with the other and not criticize. Even though you want to tell them off big time, and tell them how wrong they are, you should NOT criticize but instead simply say gently, "look, I know we don't agree on this but maybe if we talk it out reasonably we can find some middle ground that we both can live with".

Third, There is a communications technique that will have each of you completely understand what the other is trying to say. It goes like this, when something is said to you, just repeat back to them "I heard you say that - then repeat back to them what they just said - is that correct?"Then simply let your partner do the same thing by saying back to you what you said. This will make sure that what you are saying is understood between the two of you without any misconceptions of the conversation.

Here's the bottom line. You promised to Love, Honor and Obey for better or worse, in sickness and health, so help you God. It is your duty, honor and privilege to save your marriage at all costs. Remember, forgiveness is one of the most powerful and humbling things that you can do for your partner when they are feeling guilty for what was done that caused your marriage troubles.

Proper communication skills along with being reasonable about the others needs without thinking only of yourself will go a long way in helping to save your marriage or troubled relationship.