They say always use a condom, I say always use a whip   They say be careful where you come at night   I just shoot straight from the hip   When it comes to loves great fountain, I won't just take a sip   I'll swallow and I'll gulp until the fountain makes me sick      So it's me left with the baby and disease   You can't say you didn't want it on your hands and on your knees   You made me feel so special   You were especially good I'm sorry that you misunderstood      These neatly folded corduroys hide rubber underneath   But the only rubber you have worn is that useless rubber sheath   I won't have what I've got for you stolen by no thief   'Cause the safest sex I've ever had was hanging from a tree      So you've left me for another pretty face   Oh that's not true I left you for one half the human race   Now I'm by myself   A woman who knows her place it's not so much the chase, it's the race      They say treat her like a lady and she'll treat you like her jewels   They say cruel to be kind, I just say cruel to be cruel   They say only marry once, I say only marry fools   They wouldn't have made the cane if you weren't meant to break the rules      Have you told them that you'll hurt them then be gone?   I've told them that I'll hurt them if that really turns them on   You left a bitter scar   I tied those ropes too tight, I'll tie them loose for you tonight, tonight, tonight      When I told you that I loved you, I meant mini-correct   When I said I'd never leave you, I meant mini-correct   A ring around your finger, a chain around your neck   That was major correct