More and more I see you stain your soul   Godless life, cartoons and rock and roll   Friday night-woo-put on yer red gown   And slide into the darkness on the edge of town   The afterlife for heathens can be scary   So I hope you're never crushed by something heavy      In my mind, in ethereal space   I see you under me with a melting face   Round and round until you're all but saved   I had some kids and pressed it on them till they caved   Satan waits for you under my Chevy   So I hope you're never crushed by something heavy      I nurture my addiction on my new Dell laptop   But when I pray, I can hear a little plop   I never said a word about the complications   Office jobs, trials and tribulations   The afterlife for heathens can be hairy   So I hope you're never crushed by something heavy.