Rita spits out her laurel leaf   and grabs a piece of my pie   she's gonna lead me up the mountain path   as the crows fly      Claudette's pretty quick off the mark   like a polaris missile in heat   she smiles at a hundred miles an hour   and rushes you off your feet      There's all these friends of mine   they've got me suffering   they don't take a line   they keep me pissing adrenalin      Ratty is nearly unique   looks like a Pre-Raphaelite barb freak   wears dangerous jewellery   got a cast iron personality      Sandie wears an awful lot of silk   says she's a friend of Mr Acker Bilk   she's going out of my mind   wants to live on milk      There's all these friends of mine ...      I was musing on the pool outdoors   about foreign matters and fancy affairs   Betty trimmed my nails with pliers   while eating avocado pears      Norman's sobbing cos his make-up's   running away with itself   he's heading for an early grave   scared to death about the state of his health      There's all these friends of mine ...