Come back DJ   What's wrong with this track?   This ain't no cutting-edge groove   It's the needle skipping back   Everybody's got disrhythmia   This breakbeat's so confusing   They'll think the latest batch of E   Been cut with jazz-fusion   Come back DJ   It's getting ugly in here   There's no more bottled water   They're starting on the beer   Everybody's coming down   It'll be a free-for-all   Any more freestylin'    They'll be wanting Aussie Crawl      Come back DJ   Your record is scratched      Come back DJ   They'll suss why you came   Double-deckin' in the cubicle   With DJ Underage   When they find out what you are   How bad's it gonna get?   You never hung with Nik Fish   All your friends were Mullets   What you know 'bout Gabba   You learned watching the Test   You flew in from Ibiza?   Nah - The bus from Airport West   Come back DJ   I'll admit I'm scared   Hurry put your cans back on   They've started lobbing theirs   There's something way too feral   'bout this Tribal Gathering   I think De Rigueurmortis   Has started setting in    They've stormed the stage   They're at your booth   But you're still out the back   With some private schoolgirl   Doin blow with Slim Boy's Fat