Someone please save us, us college kids   What my parents told me is what i did   They said go to school and be a college kid   But in the end i questioned why i did      I'm poor, I'm starving, I'm flat broke, I've got no cash to spend   Sell all my books for front row tickets to dave matthews band   My girlfriends at another school i know this year will test her   I called, found out she had 3 other boyfriends last semester      [Chorus]   And thats why i say   Oh no, not for me, not for me   Call it torture, call it university   No, arts and crafts is all i need   I'll take caligraphy and then i'll make a fake degree      80 grand later i found out taht all i had learned   Is that you should show up to take your finals and your midterms   The party scene is kinda mean, i think its sick and twisted   The navy showed up at my dorm and claimed that i enlisted      [Chorus]      Dont get excited, she'll say "no" without a doubt you see   And ive decided college girls just wont go out with me   They make me nervous and they always catch me off my guard   Like cell phone service i drop out cause college is too hard      Its time to call my father   Cause its his alma mater   Good grades arent what they seem   I think he knows the dean   Its time to call my father   Cause its his alma mater   He said hes proud of me   But college always was his dream   And i would always say its not for me      [Chorus]      Phi, beta, delta, kappa   Do waht will make you happy   Do what you feel is right   Only but one thing matters   Learn how to live your life