I'm not an anarchist   but I know a man who is   He composed this masterpiece   about the nouveau stinking riche   Of cabbages and future kings   and marriage guidance councelings   Of geriatrics losing hope   in Stephen Patrick's overcoat      Excuse my rudery   but stuff the jubilee!      It's the last tango at the palace   Christopher goes down on Alice   A make-up girl from Selfridges   unaccustomed to such privelages      of His Majesty's secret services   The kind of secret services   usually confined to circuses      Excuse my rudery      but stuff the jubilee!   Princess A to Princess Bea   and all their work for charity   Every royal lion' s head   on every boiled and frying egg   And every sodding polo team   in Hello ! bloody magazine      And if you feel this story lacks   the royal seal on candle wax   Reel to reels of scuzzy facts   of dodgy deal and income tax   String me up from Traitor's Gate   stick my head upon a stake   And if you feel this story sucks   that's probably becauae I made it up   I didn' t really hitch a lift   to Windsor Castle bearing gifts   And I can prove it wasn' t me   I was on a stage in Germany   I'vealways loved the Oueenie Mum   her daughters and her daughter' s sons   From Princess A to Princess Bea   And all the Royal Family      Stuff the jubilee!