Do a show, save a child   Raise a million bucks that’ll last a while   Fight at parties buy a horse   Lose a couple win that big divorce      I wanna be in the headlines   Anything to be in the headlines      Saw my chance, took my break   Took the biggest float in the rose parade   Got jailed, got disgraced   A hundred million people saw my face      Call a conference with the press   Announce my marriage plans in a wedding dress   Climb a building at six-below   On New Years Eve without a stitch of clothes      As long as they spell my name right   I hope they catch my best side      I popped out from a cake   At the president’s ball what a big mistake   Fifty guns aimed at me   I was nearly killed but what publicity   Nominated, something big   Stole the hottest scene says the Globe and Tribe   Porno movie comes to light   But I was starving then so that’s all right      As long as they spell my name right   I hope they catch my best side   Keep my sidewalk star status bright   (Feel free to walk on me tonight)   Just don’t spit on me