Gaston (spoken): Who does she think she is? That girl has tangled with   the wrong man! No one says "no" to Gaston!      Lefou: Heh heh. Darn right.      Gaston: Dismissed! Rejected! Publicly Humiliated!    Why, it's more than I can bear.      Lefou: More beer?      Gaston: What for? Nothing helps. I'm disgraced.      Lefou: Who, you? Never! Gaston, you've got to pull yourself together.      Lefou:(singing) Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Gaston   Looking so down in the dumps   Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston   Even when taking your lumps   There's no man in town as admired as you   You're everyone's favourite guy   Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you   And it's not very hard to see why      No one's slick as Gaston   No one's quick as Gaston   No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston   For there's no man in town half as manly   Perfect, a pure paragon   You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley   And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on      Men in Pub: No one's been like Gaston   A king pin like Gaston   Lefou: No one's got a swell cleft in his chin like Gaston   Gaston: As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating   Men: My- what a guy, that Gaston      Men: Give five "hurrahs!"   Give twelve "hip-hips!"   Lefou: Gaston is the best   And the rest is all drips      Men: No one fights like Gaston   Douses lights like Gaston   Man 1: In a wrestling match nobody bites like Gaston   Girls: For there's no one as burly and brawny   Gaston: As you see I've got biceps to spare   Lefou: Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny   Gaston: (That's right!)   And ev'ry last inch of me's covered with hair      Men: No one hits like Gaston   Matches wits like Gaston   Lefou: In a spitting match nobody spits like Gaston   Gaston: I'm espcially good at expectorating   (Ptooey!)   Men: Ten points for Gaston!      Gaston: When I was a lad I ate four dozen eggs   Ev'ry morning to help me get large   And now that I'm grown I eat five dozen eggs   So I'm roughly the size of a barge      Men: No one shoots like Gaston   Makes those beauts like Gaston   Lefou: Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Gaston   Gaston: I use antlers in all of my decorating   Men: Say it again   Who's a man among men?   And then say it once more   Who's the hero next door?   Who's a super success?   Don't you know? Can't you guess?   Ask his fans and his five hangers-on   There's just one guy in town who's got all of it down   Lefou: And his name's G-A-S- T -   G-A-S-T - E -   G-A-S-T-O - oh!      GASTON!!!