Down in the workshop   all the elves were makin' toys   For the good Gentile girls   and the good Gentile boys   When the boss busted in,   nearly scared 'em half to death   Had a rifle in his hands and   cheap whiskey on his breath   From his beard to his boots   he was covered with ammo   Like a big fat drunk    disgruntled Yuletide Rambo   And he smiled as he said   with a twinkle in his eye   "Merry Christmas to all--   now you're all gonna die!"      The night Santa went crazy   The night St. Nick went insane   Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal   Something finally must have snapped in his brain      Well, the workshop is gone now   he decided to bomb it   Everywhere you'll find pieces   of Cupid and Comet   And he tied up his helpers   and he held the elves hostage   And he ground up poor Rudolph   into reindeer sausage   He got Dancer and Prancer   with an old German Luger   And he slashed up Dasher   just like Freddie Krueger   And he picked up a flamethrower   and he barbequed Blitzen   And he took a big bite and said,   "It tastes just like chicken!"      The night Santa went crazy   The night Kris Kringle went nuts   Now you can't hardly walk around the North Pole   Without steppin' in reindeer guts      There's the National Guard and the F.B.I.   There's a van from the Eyewitness News   and helicopters circlin' 'round in the sky   And the bullets are flyin', the body count's risin'   and everyone's dyin' to know, oh Santa, why?   My my my my my my   You used to be such a jolly guy      Yes, Virginia, now Santa Claus is dead   Some guy from the S.W.A.T. team   blew a hole through his head   Yes, little friend now   He has his brains on the floor   Guess you won't have the fat guy   to kick around anymore   Well now there's no more presents   for the children's enjoyment   And the elves gotta stand in line   to file for unemployment   And they say Mrs. Claus   she's on the phone every night   With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights      They're talkin' bout--the night Santa went crazy   The night St. Nicholas flipped   Broke his back for some milk and cookies   Sounds to me like he was tired of gettin' gypped      Wo, the night Santa went crazy   The night St. Nick went insane   Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal   Something finally must have snapped in his brain   Wo, something finally must have   snapped in his brain   Tell ya, something finally must have   snapped... in his brain