Hey girl   I got somethin' real important to give you   So just sit down and listen      Girl you know we've been together such a long long time   (Such a long time)   And now I'm ready to lay it on the line   Wow, you know it's Christmas and my heart is open wide   (Open wide)   Gonna give you something so you know what's on my mind   (What's on my mind)      A gift real special, so take off the top   Take a look inside it's my dick in a box   It's in a box      Not gonna get you a diamond ring   That sort of gift don't mean anything   Not gonna get you a fancy car   Girl, ya gotta know you're my shinin' star      Not gonna get you a house in the hills   A girl like you needs somethin' real   Wanna get you somethin' from the heart   Somethin' special girl      It's my dick in a box   My dick in a box babe   It's my dick in a box   Ooh, my dick in a box girl      See I'm wise enough to know   When a gift needs givin', and I got just the one   Somethin' to show ya that you are second to none      To all the fellas out there with ladies to impress   It's easy to do just follow these steps      1, cut a hole in a box   2, put your junk in that box   3, make her open the box   And that's the way you do it      It's my dick in a box   My dick in a box babe   It's my dick in a box   Ooh, my dick in a box girl      Christmas, dick in a box   Hanukkah, dick in a box   Kwanzaa, a dick in a box   Every single holiday a dick in a box      Over at your parents' house, a dick in a box   Mid-day at the grocery store, a dick in a box   Backstage at the CMA's, a dick in a box      My dick in a box   My dick in a box   My dick in a box