When I joined a band I thought my life was pretty cool   We’d stay in hotels with room service and pools   Sign body parts for fans   Check into rehab and smash up the van   But looking back I should have stayed in school.      Life out on the road can be dangerous you see   To rock stock food and smelly roadies   Are not nearly as scary    As that girl who’s at every show   Mouthing the words from the front row   The stalker girl is scaring the hell out of me      She’s my creepy stalker girl   I’m the centre of her wacked out crazy and delusional world   She follows me every everywhere   She’s even got a bag with some bits of my hair   Just go away you creepy stalker girl      She says I touch her in a very special way   But I’d never go near her now without my pepper spray   And the voices in her head   Said break into my house and sleep in my bed   And they also said that shaving the cat was okay      She’s my creepy stalker girl   I’m the centre of her wacked out crazy and delusional world   She follows me every everywhere   She’s even got a bag with some bits of my hair   Just go away you creepy stalker girl      I’ve analysed your handwriting and I’ve got some bad news   You’re manic obsessive with abandonment issues   And you think that all our songs   Are about you and you’re usually wrong   Except for now this song is so about you   You creepy stalker girl, you creepy stalker girl, you creepy stalker girl