On the first day of Christmas my company gave to me   A pink slip for under the tree      On the second of Christmas my company gave to me   2 days to pack   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the third day of Christmas my company gave to me   3 Bic pens   Is that right 2 days to pack?   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the fourth day of Christmas, I gave my company   4 letter words   3 more pens   Well I’m gonna take this lamp too, then   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the fifth day of Christmas my company gave to me   5 days of sleep   4 letters words   3 bic pens   And this stapler and my coat rack and…   A pink slip for under the tree      On the sixth day of Christmas, my company gave to me   Six months of Cobra   5 days of sleep   Wake up you freaking monkey, it’s almost break time!   Oh, thanks. Is the roach coach here yet?   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the seventh day of Christmas my company gave to me   7 check a –bouncing   Oh, dear!   6 months of Cobra   5 days of sleep   I got your bonus right here!   3 lousy pens   I’m calling security   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the eighth day of Christmas my company gave to me   8 hours of drinking   I have never bounced a check in my life   5 day of sleep   You big Goofbag!   Bunch of Sticky notes   Can I at least keep thee pocket protector?   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the ninth day of Christmas my company gave to me   9 cans a cat food   8 hours of drinking   Could you not breathe on me please?   I can’t afford Cobra   5 days of sleep   4 festive words   3 Bic pens   Only 2 days to pack   And a pink slip for under the tree   I got a blue one      On the tenth day of Christmas my company gave to me   10 workers weeping,   There, there missy, it’s gonna’ get a lot worse than this   God, I hope my kids don’t get sick   Want some cat food?   5 days of sleep   Bite me!    Do I hear sexual harassment?   Would you help me carry this copier to my car, please?   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the eleventh day of Christmas my company gave to me   Eleventh hour pleading   10 workers weeping   You know I know a guy that’ll hire all three of you girls, sight unseen   And you get to work with a cobra, imagine that!   5 days of sleep   4 letter words   I ‘m warning you!   Can’t we all just get along?   And a pink slip for under the tree      On the twelfth day of Christmas my company gave to me   12 employees bumming   I know girls, I know   Say, you girls need a ride home? I got my par carked right out front?   Five days of sleep   I gave this place the best years of my life and they gave me the shaft!   And a pink slip for under the tree   Tree? What tree? We’re not gonna be able to afford a tree!