Parody of "A Night To Remember" by Joe Diffie (Max T. Barnes/T. W. Hale) Curb Songs/Kinetic Diamond II/Rob 'N Reily/Songs Of Peer, Ltd./Gramily Music Publishing (ASCAP)   New Lyrics by Cledus T. Judd/Chris Clark/Jeff Carter, Cledus Crap Anthems (SESAC)/Of Music, Inc. (SESAC)/Jeff Carter music (ASCAP)      Paul does this kind of thing every day      Yeah    Like what skip a rehearsal    You know we got the CMA Awards tomorrow night   What are we gonna do about a drummer   (to a kid)   Hey you come here   You ever played drums before      No      Want to       Yeah      Get in there and beat 'em then   OK hot dog   Start too soon you little showboat   Who do you think you are Tommy Lee Jones   Let's go      Uh…not bad for a four year old      Been dang near two years   Since I had a beer   By gosh that's changing tonight   Gonna start me a tab   Call me a cab   (* whistle *) TAXI   Might even get in a fight   I ain't going hog-wylin' forever   Gonna have myself a night I can't remember      Miller Lights a shot of Crown   Man that stuff burns goin' down   One too many Coke and Jacks It'll all come floatin' back   That Old Cuervo's way too strong   But one more 'fore I go home fire up the blender   Gonna have myself a night I can't remember      (Give me a cool tab and a gun)      Drunk ain't my style   And it'll be a long while 'fore I pull that stunt again   (Oh my head)   Tylenol and Tums   Oh no here it comes   I'm prayin to the porcelain   This hangover can't last forever   Done had myself a night I can't remember      OH   Shot out the lights   Kicked down the door   Woke up face down on the floor   I'd better call someone and ask   How'd I wind up in this cast   I got stamps on both my hands   I wonder who threw that beer can   Right through my winder   Done had myself a night I can't remember      OHHHHH   My dang liver's nearly gone   In AA's where I belong   Hey thanks bartender   Done had myself a night    I can't remember      Twelve steps my foot    I can't even take two   And by the way kid you're hired   Just no drinkin'    I mean it