I traveled south for a holiday    Drak some wine and mojitos    Played upon the white sand    And made myself an amigo       I ate some shrimp and papya    Thought the barbeque was grand    But unbeknowest to me I at    a little Cuban friend       Chorus:    My little Cuban friend    Lives inside my digestive tract    My little Cuban friend    I wish that he'd go back       I traveled home on the plane    thought my trip was at an end    But at the immigration booth I forgot    My little Cuban friend       In my country and my bowels    He's and illegal alien    He's giving me intestinal cramps    My little Cuban friend       Chorus       I went to see my doctor    To see shet she would recommend    She gave me a perscription to kill    My little Cuban friend       I read the list they gave me    Of potential side effects    Scary, but worth elimimating    My little Cuban friend       Chorus       But now my head it feels like breaking    I'm projectile vomiting    It sprays around the room but at least    I'm getting better at darts       My hemorrhoids they itch so much    I'd like to sit upon a fence    I'm longing fo the old days    With my little Cuban friend